Goodboy Norman Featherstone

Monday, January 30, 2006

Quite Bored ...

Yeah, I know I haven't blogged in a couple weeks, but it's not my fault. Things have just been boring around here. Who wants to read a blog about how I slept for 20 hours, licked my paw and barked at the neighbor dog? There's really no way to spice that up! Well, maybe if I was wearing a cape or something - that would be cool. But I'm not wearing a cape. I hope February is more exciting. Maybe I will get to go for a walk or something. My hopes are rising!

Thursday, January 12, 2006

Hot dogs cause cancer?

According to some Sue Gilbert lady from MSN Health and Fitness, hot dogs can cause cancer:

Many foods, especially cured meats such as bacon and hot dogs, use nitrates to preserve color and maintain microbial safety. Nitrate is harmless, but it can convert to nitrite, which can form nitrosamines, a powerful cancer-causing chemical, in your body. Whenever possible, look for nitrate-free preserved meats. When you do eat foods containing nitrates, have a glass of orange juice at the same time (for instance, orange juice with your morning bacon). Vitamin C is known to inhibit the conversion to nitrosamines in your stomach.

You can check out the full article if you're interested in her thoughts on unhealthy foods. I warn you though, she isn't going to agree with your dietary habits. She's probably got some kind of eating disorder and tries to justify her inability to eat by the "fact" that all food is bad for you. I don't know though - I'm just a dog. Don't flame me for that comment.

I recommend that you are better safe than sorry, and you should send all your hot dogs and cured meats to me for immediate disposal.

On another note, the People have not removed the Christmas tree from the living room. I feel sorry for it - standing there all naked and stripped of its pretty decorations, just waiting for the day to come that it is tossed into the trash. Poor bugger. If it had dropped me more presents, I might be fighting harder to keep it. As it is, however, my presents were kind of lame, so it's on its own! Let this be a warning to all future Christmas trees! Drop me more presents, or it's the axe for you!

Tuesday, January 10, 2006

Why do I smell like Fritos?

I don't even get to eat Fritos, but for some reason, I always smell like I have been rolling around in a bag of them (minus the greasy sheen). The Woman bathes me, and the smell susbides for a while, but within a day or so, that corn chip stench returns! So, I went on a search to find the answer to the age-old Pug question, "Why do I smell like Fritos?"

I searched the Internet high and low and found many theories. One suggested it could be the low quality of my dog food, but The Woman buys me expensive dog food from the Petsmart store made of lamb and rice, so that can't be it. Another theory proposed that I could have a mild skin condition, but I go to the Vet regularly, and I don't have itching problems, so I don't think that could be it either. Another Pug owner suggested Frito is just the Pug's natural scent. Welll, I guess that could be the answer then ... that there is no answer. Perhaps I could invent a spray that counteracts Frito scent. I bet Pug owners every where would want some! Wait, Mr. Chris already has something that does the same thing - Febreze. Yeah, he Febrezes me. Don't tell The Woman, or she won't let him pugsit me any more. (She thought he only Febrezed The Chewb.)

I was surprised and comforted to find that many Pugs smell like Fritos, and that most of their People find the smell endearing. At least I'm not alone, right? I guess I will try to learn to embrace my Frito-likedness and be all the Pug that I can be. That's a lot of Pug, let me tell you ...

Monday, January 09, 2006

Check me out - I'm hip and with it!

Hey everyone. I'm cool now, because I have a blog on blogspot. It's pretty neat, because you can all post comments and stuff now, and I can more easily update my blog without having to format the html myself. You'd be surprised how bad I am at html. I know, I know, my website is so fantastic, how could I possibly be BAD at html? Well, I guess I'm good at hiding my weaknesses, which is why the Mean One will never find my achilles heal! This blogspot stuff is pretty cool - there are buttons for formatting my text and everything! No more looking up the html color code for stuff. Wootzilla! There is even a button to check my spelling! No more copying from notepad into Word to check my spelling. This is going to be great! Wait a second - I can't get the spellchecker to work ...

Now I just need to figure out how to get my old blogs into this new blog. Well, until I do that, you'll just have to follow the clunky link from to here. The Woman might make me get rid of altogether once she finds out blogspot is free. It is free, right? The Woman won't give me any more money, so I hope to pugness it is free.

The Woman undecorated the Christmas tree and took down all the Christmas decorations last night. I was very sad. There is now a 0% chance that the Christmas tree will drop presents for me. That is quite the bummer. I thought we were going to leave the tree up for a little while longer, because The Woman bought a new Christmas tree skirt the other day, but it turns out she bought it for next year because it was 75% off after Christmas. It's very pretty. You have to know she wrapped me up in it and made me walk around like a Catholic Cardinal at Christmas Mass. I was cute though, I'm sure.

Well, I hope you all like the new blog. I look forward to keeping it more updated now that it isn't such a pain in the paw!