Bad Things I Don't Do

The People are often telling me I'm a bad dog, because I bark a lot, whine, pee on things and am really annoying in the car. So, I am making a list to show you all the bad things I don't do. Maybe this will help put things into perspective the next time I get punished for something.

I do not:

• Chew things up.
• Bite people.
• Dig holes in the yard.
• Roll in the mud.
• Trample the Woman's flowers.
  
• Bring in dead things I found outside.
• Run away.
• Howl at night.
• Bark at night.
• Steal food from peoples' plates.

I think this is a pretty long list for as bad as the People make me out to be most of the time.

The stupid Vet was trying to talk the Woman into getting me neutered. What is it with male Vets and my dingle-dangles? They always want to cut them off! It's interesting that the female Vets never mention cutting them off. I think the men are just jealous of my endowment. So anyway, if the People want to see a really bad dog, just try and have me neutered!! Then we'll see who the bad dog is.